My heart screams to me,
Stop this, you are only going to hurt
I numb it out with my mind, twisting, delicate,
Stop this, you are only going to hurt
I look at her and all I feel is joy,
Stop this, you are only going to hurt
Is the pain what makes this real?
Stop this, you are only going to hurt
Her love rebounds, resonates within me,
Stop this, you are only going to
I can’t, I won’t, I refuse to
Stop this, you are only going
For the sweaty, delicious, enervating moments are what I long for
Stop this you are only
Her smile is the sunflower she speaks so fondly of
Stop this, you are
Beautiful, sad, whole
Stop this you
Are the light of my days, the dark of my nights.
I am going to hurt,
I am going to hurt you.
Let’s hurt together.
It all felt like home
for the longest time
Yet I knew
when such bliss
began to fill my days
Sadness was always
around the corner
and now you are
as good to me as
days that do not exist
and never will.
You change so similarly
to the lunar calender
So full of all your light
then just a sliver of it
then none at all
"If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they’re yours; if they don’t they never were.”- Richard Bach – Yeah?.. well fuck that shit and fuck Richard Bach. Do you honestly think, I have the time to meet someone, click, grow an attachment, fall in love, deeply in love, I’m not talking your average crush, I’m talking, going back to the days where we used to write love letters from long distances type of love, the “making a cup of tea and blowing it until its warm enough for them to drink” type of love… to have a soul connection, miss them, crave them, submit to them, etc.. just to let them go in the future. Wdf. Listen, if it’s gotton deep enough for me to fall into that type of love, I’m not letting you go. Fuck, I hate this generation of replacers. If something goes wrong, instead of fixing it, we replace, or let it go or some other dumb shit. No. Richard Bach, who is divorced, I will not take advice from you. As long as it isn’t toxic and unhealthy, I am not letting go."-- TGV (via kushandwizdom)
Do you want me as much as I want you?
And I don’t mean in the physical, “I want to fuck you way”
I mean in the “I want to hold your hand and fall asleep with you and while you slumber tell you not how beautiful you are to me but how beautiful you are to the world and how you deserve someone much better, fitter, prettier, smarter, better, than me and hope you can hear well in your dreamland and then tell you how I want you to make me feel like the only star in the universe, the one that shines brightest but that will never burn out, to make me feel like the one who deserves everything you tell her in the pitch of the night, but I also want you to tell me these things in the daylight when I can show you those three scars on my arm, when you can see every single blemish that I refuse to cover up on my acne-riddled face, when the cellulite between my thighs and covering my once-thin tummy jiggles while I laugh at the silly jokes you tell me to cover up the fact that we both are terrified at being hurt again and what I want the most is for you to read this terrible poem and tell me I’m not crazy for wanting these things because you want them too.”
Three-thousand memories ago I once wrote the line, “I’m tragically in love with the idea of you” but I’ve moved past that. I’m at the point where I’m just praying you aren’t in love with an idea of me, because believe me, it’s twisted, it’s warped, it’s a facade. I hope that as soon as you realize I am Jess The Mess you don’t run away screaming, because I sure as hell would.
"Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life."-Bob Marley (via kushandwizdom)
So It Is All
I believe with all my heart
That our births into this universe
And that each sharp cry falling first
From our infant tongue and diaphragm
Shakes the dirt and rock beneath
And we are justified to be until we are no longer
When the crying dies down
The wanting begins in its place
And that hunger is necessity
Because it is at all
So we grow as it grows
We twist with its twisting
So life is absurd and good
And its many hosts and visitors
Growing, changing, bending
Scrambling to find their roots
Or to destroy them
All absurd in our short existence
And we guests know with the wanting
With the growing and changing
Comes the death of all we’ve collected
The final dance of the aging spirit
Taking its last bow to settle the accounts
Returning the borrowed dirt and rock from below
So it is all good and absurd
That we are no longer wanting
When there is no place for us to want
And it is lovely and well that
We can no longer bend or stretch or change
When we are no longer
Written by Marcus Dean Terry (Click Here for More)
A clouded mind is only
capable of thinking clouded
thoughts but with you, it’s
like I’m a bird flying away
from the clouds to a
poetry by leaveyouapen
Everyone’s a broken little mirror,
on the streets, in the parties, at the
bars; we’re looking for a reflection
of ourselves to fall in love with.
Mirrors are a trick of light; it’s harder
echoing what’s on the inside
when we’re only looking for what’s
similar in the dark.
poetry by leaveyouapen
Cheetos and Sammie rap(april2)
Cheetos: Im chillin killin like a villin and im stillin your heart and it looks like art i love u sammie you shine bright it looks like a light … Lmao im stupid ;)
Sammie: You say you can rap but im better then that.
You say you can steal my heart and it looks like art well baby boo let me tell you sumthin i aint stuntin’
You got me trippin so you better catch me.
My heart if falling for you cant you see .
You got me stutterin all these words that come out my mouth when i talk to you i feel like ima mumblin’
Now. I know this aint the best and some of this stuff i said aint true but at least i can rap Betta then You ;)
Cheetos:I pray to god,
I ask why god? Why?
But it’s not his fault, It’s all on I,
Know I did so many things,
To deserve this ending,
But I know with one more chance,
I’d make a happy ending, spending,
The rest of my life with you girl,
Cause you were my world,
My flawless pearl,
You can’t get better,
And you won’t get worse,
Sammie:Yes you messed and i know that
You hurt me what all the stuff you did and i hated that
Maybe someday we can be how we used to be
Because when i was with you , you made me sing like a Bumble bee.
You made me happy and showed me what love is,
Until my world went upside down
And all i could do it frown
See you talk to that other girl and just know you talked to her at school Hurts me.
Im still a liddo hurt inside cant you see.
Well hopefully time will go by and and we can go sky High again.
Cause when im with ttalking with you
I never feel blue .
Psh like i said this may not be the best rap.
But i sure can rap a liddo better then that :)
Cheetos:Now i know i fucked up every one fucks up.
If i would see you every day . My light will shine so bright i have a crush on your like no other..
If u lived here ill introduce u too my mother.
Your soo dam beautiful..
I dont wanna be hurtfull.
Sammi sammantha i want u like a fanta.
Come on here and we can go to sleep. I love you
I love you so deep.!!
Sammie:Now that Rhyme you just said man that was so sweet.
Got Me Breathless You’ll never hear a tweet.
Yea i guess you say you have a crush on me.
But what happen when you said you loved your ex forever isnt that what tou toldme?
She was your first love and i get that :/
But i sometimes wish that shouldve been me .
And i hatted that .
But oh well i had my first love already too but it wasnt you :/
Which sucks cause he hurt me a liddo more then you.
He promised me forever and where is he now .
I just hope you you mean the things you say because ill probably start to love you either way.
But thats in the bast now and this is the present .
Im ready for the future and i hope your in et!
Maybe someday ill be up there soon ,
Then we could act like liddo cute Fools.
Saying I love you baby your all mine.
Hahaa i knoow this is a cheesy ryhme but youre worth more then a Dime :D
Im actually having fun rapping this stuff out.
Even tho some of this stuff im saying aint true yet .
I can be Your Angelina and You can Be my Bradd pit :)
Cheetos:Baby baby the words comimg out are true, your no everythings true . Someday , oh someday when u come we could kiss under the stars and they we can fly to mars… Your a beautiful girl your like my world… All the things u say make me smile .. Ill fly a thousand MILLES for you… When i talk to u . My world goes from red to blue. Baby baby maybe sumeday we can be together and ill tell your lips a secret … And they will know how to read it . <3
Sammie:Haha damn You make my day shine Bright.
No not like a diamond cause that shit reflects.
Im saying bright as the smile on my face.
I have butterflies in my stomach.
Ohh how i wish to feel your embrace.
You got me singing on a Hamock.
You make me go in a daze :)
Your Amazing out and in.
And so sweet like candy
That im sorta Cravin’:)
Now thats enough of rapping cause im getting a liddo tired .
Shitt its getting late :o
I havent EVEN TOOK A SHOWER :o
Cheetos:Hahah o baby baby. I love you take a shower then txt me. Your so crazyyyy… Baby u shine brighter then a light … But its so fucking bright
One day will kiss. Under the mistletoe… Hahaha i love you and im not a ho3. Someday someday. Will meet.
And ill pick you off your feet.!! <3
Cheetos:Morning morning how are you is your face blue baby turn that frown upside down and turn around. Come to me and ill kiss you and will stick like glue. Hahaha baby u looks so beautiful and im being hurtful. Your like a big star that brights like the sky. I love you hunny youll always be my bunny.
Sammie:GoodMorning How dis yyou sleep ?
Did you you dream of me ;)
Shidd cause i did !
And it was nothing horrid.
Slept with a smile on my face .
Dang you made me go in a Daze .
Psh i may shine bright like sunshine but hey you Are my sunshine 😏
Somday youll be mine .
Cheetos:Awwww <3 baby i might not be yours now but i will be later….
Fuck my haters. You and i can go off to mars and fly although it to fars… Hahaha im funny bunny what did u dream of me.?was it goody or baddy. Tell me. ;)
Sammie:Hhaa oh trust babby it was nothing baddy.
You and i was chillin under the stars,
You slipped me a kiss ,
And it made me fly to mars.
Then we cusdles watching old movies :)
Psh i dont mine that cause that was kinda groovy haha.
I may not be the best at this but i know how to make you mine, and thats with my kiss ❤
Cheetos:Baby baby i know some of these things u dont mean but fuck it i take it so clean. Someday ull come to jackson. Hun. But not today fuck it i want it my way. And when i see you ill pick you off your feet . And put u to sleep haha im so funny but your still my bunny.!! <3 <3
Sammie:Haha hunny i May not be truthfull in some of this ryhmes but i promise you , you actually worth more to me then a Dime.
I know some of these things i say will come true
Cause haha you know its you ❤
But like i said only time can tell.
But what the Hell
Who cares !
Youll soon be mine
And your always on my minds !
Cheetos:Baby baby how are u goodafter noon hahah its so soon. But i was think of our raps today. Lol cuz i like it your way.! <3 you might be so far Away but u looked beautiful today.!!! <3
I love you baby.<3 smile and we can all make it last while it lasts.!!<3
Sammie:Heyy Boo my day went good ,
But im still in School:(
In athletics watching these girls run ughhh
They give me headaches !
Well at least you texted me now ,
Hehe now my world wont be upside down :)
You made smile when i saw your named poped up
Hahaha i laughed so hard i startted to choke up :o
How was you day My love
Was it better then the Skys above ?:)
Cheetos:Well yes. It was.!!
Thinking about u was wonderful.! <3 u know why cuz your beautiful.! <3 hahaha i love u so much .! I wish i could see u . Dont worry your head will be allright. Ok might :D
Your gona see me one day .
All we gota do is sit and wait.
You made y Day Shine like the Moon light at night.
Everytime i think about you i love you more then my Might!
You got be singing melodies over here.
Trust me im not promising you im good at singing ao cover your ears ;)
Raping with you is the best thing ever!
It makes my days and nights a whole lot better.
Cheetos:Haha,Hahahahah . O sammie your so cute… I think im falling for you.! I try not to flirt with girls sammie but they come to ME.! Ahaha dont worry. Look at me .!! Hahaha im cute . Right.?
I love u and i wanna hug u so tight.
Sammie: Im sorry I didnt Text you.
Cause I fell asleep on you.
Even tho i Didnt dream of you.
I still went to sleep thinkng of you.
This ryhm aint really Great .
This one i really Hate.
You get me Butterflies.
Damn and ill go flyinngg in to the school so high.
You got blushing like a dork.
Keep being sweet with me cause i want more:)
Cheetos:OHH. Hun that was sweet i still wanna meet.! <3
Lets runaway even tho its a crime.
Fuck it your mine. Hahaha
I might not be the cutest guy but i think im pullin u.
Hahah turn it from blue to who.? Babe i love u from here to the moon and back down so soon <3 (MUAHHH) :*
Sammie:Im laying in my bed.
Thinking of you instead.
You got me singing Like a fool :)
And i Dont know what to do.
Your the sunshine i my life !
Oh dang i want you to be mine❤
My heart beats fast for ya!
And the butterflies in my stomach go round and round ohh yaa :)
Cheetos:Baby why so much butter flies .
When in tell your heart a sectret then get them.
Im like a fantam. <3
You look beautiful in your pics. Baby i wanna kiss u on your lips. Saturday.? Yea saturday i call u and ill make u blush .. Haha and laugh and fall in love be ready babe. Ull have a great time. And then youll be mine.!! <3
Cheetos:Get better . Its all so cuz of the weather.?
Turn your frown
Upside dow. Dont cry
My oh my.
Just know i was thinking about you.! <3
Turn that blue in to
You.! <3 fuck it that your
Sick we just want it to be
Weak. Lol idk whAt im saying but stop complaning . Youll get better.
Sammie. I love you and i hope you love me <3
Sammie:Hahaha I had no clue what you were saying.
And who said i was Complaining?
All i was saying was that i was sick :o
Dont worry i wont be such a Dick ;)
Hehehe i didnt go to school today :(
It was boring through out the day.
Pshh Nigga You know that i love you!
And my day isnt soo blue!
But the love i feel for you is just so cool!
Not more then a friend tho :/
Cause you know.
Why ? Idk but maybe that will change during Time !
Cheetos:Yes it will. Hahaha
U know why. Cuz im smooth with words but .
I mean them.
I dont fuck with them.
I hope i get to see you one day.
Ill have it my way.!! Haha fuck texas fuck jackson lets go to a place were its all pricless.
And we can both live happily ever after. Lets make it faster.! <3
Sammie:Hahaa Yes you will say me one day.
And all I will say ,
Is I love you baby !
Them haters with start Hating!
Lets goo Far from here
Where noone else will find us there !
Far from everybody and all the drama,
Cause soon all thr bad is gona get to them especialy the Karma :)
Dont worry I will see you one day .
But just not today :/
Cheetos:Dont be sad its not that
Hahaha one day will come.
It will all be
And ill just come up to u &
Kiss you on the lips.
Itll be our secret! <3
Sammie:Dont worry I aint even Sad !
Like you said its not even Bad.
Iguess we just gota stay Patient !
Cause time goes by slow here!
And leaves us waiting :o
One day haha one day .
Ill see u and say ima tell u a secret.
And im kiss u on your lips.
And tell them a secret.
Then ull get butterflies but no bad ones good ones.!!
Cheetos:PweeZzzz baby i know you
Let me just give u a tick. Hahaha pweeZzz
Call mezzzz lol i just wanna hear your voice.
Yes or no its your chioce. <3
Sammie:Niigga im sickk!!
And i dont mean to sound like A Dick.
But my head hurts!
Taking care of this baby while im sick is the worst!
I can barely TALK!
Further more walk!
I dont wanna be on the phone!!
Cause im stuck at home!
In this room sickker then ever!
Fuck. I hope i get a liddo better!
I miss you,
I miss your Touch,
The way your eyes sparkle in the Light.
Your body against Mine,
Your fingertips tracing down my spine,
Imiss how you Used to say I love you.
Imiss how you used to come up behind me and hug me from the waist.
Imiss everything about you.
Ijust miss you 💔
Its not love yet, just lust that i feel.
I cant get you out of my Head.
Everytime i sleep lay down at night, i wish you were in my bed.
I dream about you.
How we used to mess around, or how you used to giveme piggy back rides.
How you used to call me Babygirl,
I also sometimes dream about how me and you lay undernieth the stars wondering what can come next.
If we are going to last.
But thats just dreams 😔
Nothing never happens the way it should.
Wishing you can be mine again and last a long time.
But can you’ll never me mine.
I dont know why i lost you.
I dont know what i did wrong,
When i triedmy best a making things right.
I dont know what i did for you to do me wrong .
I know we have our ups and downs. But thats life.
We all make mistakes.
But some mistakes do greater hurt than others.
It takes time but I cant let you go.
No, not just yet.
Please. Just please dont push me right out of you life one day.
And most importantly, dont push me out of you heart and regret what we had.
Cause ill never will.
Ill wait for you if i have to.
Ill wait for as long as i can.